Is Attachment Parenting Style the Best Option for Me

Parenting may look so beautiful and awesome but it is not the real story. Behind the scenes, every parent deals with a lot of chaos, drama, and dilemmas that others never know. They often get confused about which style they must follow. But no matter how many styles you go through you always end up with the one that comes to mind in that situation right? Cool!

The attachment parenting style—is one of the methods most parents follow worldwide. Besides other methods, this style involves more physical and emotional bonding. Just like anything, attachment parenting also has pros and cons. Read more to know whether it is the right option for you. 

What Is Attachment Parenting?

Attachment denotes the exact meaning of this parenting style. The attachment parenting style involves a close emotional and physical bond with the child. The parents will barely leave the child alone, they share the bed with them, breastfeed them for long periods, and comfort every cry. The concept of attachment parenting was introduced by Drs. William and Martha Sears in “The Baby Book.” 

This kind of parenting style has been followed by people since the dawn of civilization. Parents who prefer this style debate that co-sleeping and long-term breastfeeding are natural parenting approaches for a baby. 

Their parenting style is characterized by the following 7B’s of attachment parenting. 

The 7 B’s of Attachment Parenting

Birth Bonding

This factor refers to the immediate bonding between the parents and baby right after the birth. It gets so strong during the first six weeks. Long-term cuddling encourages skin-to-skin nurture for the baby.

Breastfeeding

Breastfeeding is the first and foremost approach that strengthens the mother-baby bonding. It releases prolactin and oxytocin, the hormones that aid the bonding level.
Also Read: Breastfeeding and Weight Loss Lie

Babywearing

Some parents use a bag or cloth to carry the baby with them. By doing so, the baby will become physically attached to the mother. 

Bed Sharing

Bed sharing might sound like an unnecessary addition to the list, but babies need their mother’s support and nurturing especially during sleep.

Belief in Baby’s Cry

When a baby cries most parents think they are crying for a need. Attachment parents never like the sound of a baby crying, rather they fear and pamper them instantly. 

Beware of Baby Trainers

Baby trainers recommend new parenting techniques and styles for baby care. While some of these techniques might work, others don’t. It’s essential to be careful when planning your parenting style, taking into account your lifestyle, culture, finances, and preferences.

Balance

Being a parent is not a piece of cake, it is a lot more complicated than anything. They must balance their marital life, emotional needs, and new parent life. 

Misconceptions of Attachment Parenting for Secure Attachment

Some parents mistake attachment parenting for secure attachment. The attachment parenting style forces the parent to respond to the child in every move, whereas secure attachment lets the parent focus only on urgent needs. For example, when a baby coos during sleep, the mother rushes to the baby thinking it is crying, which is not a secure attachment. Parents can be attentive but not for unnecessary reasons as it may lead to overthinking or over-attachment towards the child. 

Why Is the Attachment Parenting Style Often Criticized?

Just like any other normal parenting attachment parenting too got criticism as follows,

Co-sleeping with the infant sometimes results in sudden infant death syndrome/ SIDS. Following a safe bed-sharing will avoid such mishaps. 

Getting attached to your children may make them feel secure in the family, but once they step out they become so farouche to deal with their peers or in any environment. 

Physical closeness—children may expect closeness even after they grow up. They still want to feel the warmth of their parents. 

Overdependence. In some cases, the parents act overprotective when the child cries, which can lead to over-dependent on them in every situation. 

What Should I follow? 

Tweak the Attachment Parenting Style a Bit. If you want to try an attachment parenting style, go ahead and create your own attachment parenting style. Criticisms may give a list of do’s and don’t list, but still, you need to think about your child’s future. Secure attachment or attachment parenting — both are different perspectives, but when it comes to parenting you must know which to follow. You can bed-share, breastfeed, and pamper as long as they need it. But remember one thing these instructions may not work in all cases. Plus, mothers’ habits and behavior will change as they age and so will the children’. As a parent, you don’t have to follow every parenting instruction strictly. You can modify the parenting style based on your situation.

Parenting is not smooth sailing, but still, you need to navigate the ocean no matter how hard the weather is. Think before you go with any options. Choose the appropriate option and gently take away their disciplining process. Also, check out the tips to become your child’s best friend.